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Today I signed up for my 9th Overnight Walk with AFSP. Last year was the first year I didn’t walk since I was introduced to AFSP. A family vacation was at the same time. Although our family vacation was amazing, I have to admit, I missed doing the walk. I missed being with others that…
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My mom always wrote me little notes. It could have been “I love you” in marker on my napkin in my school lunch, or a $0.99 Hallmark card in my bag before a track meet. She never stopped taking moments to remind me not only how much she loved me, but also what she saw…
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We are getting our primary bathroom completely redone… completely gutted. While I have been wanting this to happen since the day we moved into the house (over four years ago), nothing prepares you for living in a construction zone while working from home with a 60 pound fur baby. It has only been a week…
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Tomorrow starts a new chapter for my career… a new chapter for me. I must admit, I am so proud that I took the last six weeks off. In a culture of work and run as fast as you can, it can be hard to realize and say you need a break. It took me…
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Haven’t always been this wayI wasn’t born a renegadeI felt alone, still feel afraidI stumble through it anyway I wish someone would have told me that this life is ours to chooseNo one’s handing you the keys or a book with all the rulesThe little that I know I’ll tell to youWhen they dress you…
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Dear Dr. Rachel Martin, Today is the day you defended your dissertation. A day that seems like it would never come. A day you have looked to with excitement, anxiety, hesitation, stress. A day many think is the pinnacle of all the work you have done. A few days ago, you asked me if I…
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Today, I had the honor of doing a virtual presentation for a large company. I had originally been connected with them through my work with AFSP, but today they asked me to speak on Women and Mental Health; We need boundaries… and boy did I need to hear my own words. The presentation started with…
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I pride myself on living authentically… I don’t pretend and I write off anyone who is not authentic. Too much of life is filled with those who are pretending to be something they are not. Social media and the prevalence of our lives being online only increase the rate of which people stop truly being…
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Dear Governor Abbott, I couldn’t help but see your tweet last week: Clearly money is not an issue for the state of Texas at this time… which for someone who works in mental health and education, I am excited to hear…. I am less excited to hear that your only thought is to cut taxes…
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For some reason today, I can’t stop listening to the song, Try Everything. It has been on repeat for majority of today… I won’t give upNo, I won’t give in ’til I reach the endThen I’ll start againNo, I won’t leaveI wanna try everythingI wanna try even though I could fail When I got home…
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I think it was my 13th birthday. We were having dinner at County Line in Lubbock ( my favorite place to eat). My mom and dad gave me a pearl and diamond necklace. I loved it. It was beyond special to me and I reserved wearing it for special occasions…. I haven’t thought about this…
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When it is 1998 and your mom dies by suicide, you really don’t have much time to think. You definitely don’t have time to thoughtfully consider what you want her obituary to say. You go along with the standard because anything more would leave you paralyzed and unable to take a step forward. The guilt,…
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Ever since my mom killed herself the day after my 19 birthday in 1998, my birthday has been complicated. I go from wanting to fully embrace the day to hide under a rock. I anticipate the conflicting emotions each year and no matter how much I prepare, I struggle. As much as I try to…
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Over a month ago I was looking through pictures and one of our 8-year-old son stuck out to me. I must admit at the time, I was exhausted. This year has hit me to my core. I was weary, tired, and emotionally spent. When I saw this picture I immediately was renewed with hope. The…
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23 years ago I was almost 8 months into the journey of loosing my mom to suicide. If I am honest, I don’t really remember much from that year. I remember going to class and hanging out with friends. I remember my dad trying his hardest to continue traditions. You can say I was surviving……
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Friday afternoon, it was official that the person I have worked under for over two years is leaving. The news came right as I was leaving to pick up K from after school care. I had tears streaming down my face as I drove to the school… but as he got into the car I…
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Tomorrow will be 1,051,200 minutes since I was hired in my current positon as Director of Behavioral Health Services at Round Rock ISD. The day my hire was official I posted a blog about the journey to get to this point in my life… little did I know what was awaiting my journey. Two months…
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Complicated grief… a phrase I have heard for years… especially as a counselor… yet I never really understood it until the last few months… until I started to live complicated grief. If I am honest, I thought by my mom dying by suicide it made it complicated, and it did, yet it got even more…
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Every Christmas I can remember, there has always been this one special ornament. It is not the most expensive. It is not the prettiest. It is not the biggest… yet the message it holds is bigger than the tree. This ornament is a small green stocking with red and white accents. This stocking has been…